Daybreakers [2009]

Starring: Ethan Hawke, Willem Dafoe, Sam Niel

Directed by: The Spierig Brothers

3/5

Daybreakers has had a strange run at the cinemas. It has received some decent reviews over in the U.S., yet American audiences seem to really hate the movie. Because of such a bi polar response to the film, i wasn't sure what to expect when i sat down to watch it.

As a vampire fan, i was excited to see what kind of spin they would put on the films storyline. I was pleasantly surprised at what they came up with. The premise was original and the vampire world they created was interesting. What the film was missing however was SCOPE. The entire world is over run by vampires, and it was a shame to see the movie only show glimpses of one city and the vampires who lived in it. Most of the scenes in the vampire world take place in a high rise city building, so the vastness of how huge the "vampire epidemic" was felt a little lost on me. It would have been interesting to focus a little more on the day to day lives of what it was like to live in a vampire world, because what we did see was definitely cool.

The characters in the movie were also a little underdeveloped. Like the storyline though, they were serviceable enough, but could have been fleshed out more. Ethan Hawke seemed a little.....bored. The only characters who offered any sort of meat to the scenes were Willem Dafoe and the scenes involving Ethan's character and his brother. Everyone else was just on auto pilot. The acting itself was fine though, so it didn't take away from the over all enjoyment of the movie.

There's some good direction in Daybreakers, some nice ideas and an interesting story. It never seems to reach any major heights though due to the constant way the film holds back. If the storyline and characters had been fleshed out more, it could have been a more entertaining experience. The odd abrupt ending also felt a bit rushed as well. The whole thing felt as if it was done in a very limited time frame.

The movie was decent enough though, and if you like vampire action there's bound to be something you'll like here. No need to rush to the cinemas to see it though, save it for DVD.

My Favourite Films Of All Time! #15Return To Oz [1985]
Directed by: Walter Murch
Starring: Fairuza Balk, Jean Marsh

"Your Majesty! SHE has returned to Oz!"

Fuck The Wizard of Oz!..............there, i said it, words that people gasp and raise their arms in horror over.............fuck The Wizard of Oz!. "How could you?", some of you may be saying?, i'll tell you how i could!. Wizard of Oz is a bore fest, a very nicely acted, very nicely filmed bore fest, but a bore fest nonetheless. As a kid, i tried to watch it, i could never get through it all. As an adult, same problem. The movie just DOESN'T click with me at all. I've tried and tried, and it just ain't gonna happen. What did click with me though was the 1985 sequel, Return To Oz, i'll tell you why.......

In Return To Oz, Dorothy [Fairuza Balk] comes back from Oz and can't stop talking about the other world she visited. Her family think she's nuts, so they admit her to a mental ward, hoping that electro shock therapy will cure her of her "crazy ways". Dorothy's stay at the hospital is short lived, when she is suddenly pulled back into Oz, as she tries to escape from her new zap happy home. As Dorothy ventures into Oz once again, she soon realized, Oz ain't what it used to be. In fact, Oz is completely fucked up. No more singing midgets, no more sweet skipping around townsfolk, and no more shiny yellow brick road. Oz is scary, Oz has new evil inhabitants, and soon Dorothy finds out that she's gonna need some balls to live past a day in this "new" place. Bitch doesn't need a little dog, bitch needs a gun!.
As well as trying to stay alive, Dorothy makes some new friends in Oz. A pumpkin head man, a moose mounted on a wooden trunk [don't ask, it's confusing i know], a new fatter tin man, and a talking chicken. As you can see, Oz has become a bit freaky.

Ok, forget everything you knew about the old Oz movie. That was a film that gave children rainbow dreams and gumdrop smiles. 'Return' however gave most kids NIGHTMARES. I was one of those kids!. Seeing Dorothy get chased down by hunchback men with elongated legs and arms, wheels where their hands and feet should be, and hideously creepy voices, caused all sorts of ghastly imagery in my mind. These scary fucks were called 'Wheelers'. Ask ANYONE who's seen this movie about what stood out the most, and they'll most definitely say "the fucking wheelers!". The creep factor doesn't stop there. There's also an evil Queen who lives in Oz named Mombi [Jean Marsh]. At first she's all lovely and sweet, but soon Dorothy realizes that Mombi actually likes to COLLECT PEOPLES HEADS and store them in glass cabinets in her castle. Not only does she store them, but she REMOVES HER OWN HEAD and wears the others depending on how she feels that day. This bitch is seriously messed up!. There's one scene where Dorothy tries to escape Mombi's castle, and finds herself IN the "Head Room". There's womens heads lined up all along the walls, when they hear Dorothy IN the room, they all OPEN their eyes and glare down at her!. Honestly, what kind of sick fuck makes shit like this for kids?
Upon it's release, it didn't do too well. It flopped at the box office, and parents found it to be "too disturbing" for children. Funnily enough, 'Return' is much closer in tone with the actual Oz book series the films were based on. The books themselves [which i haven't read] do have a more darker streak to them, which was completely thrown out the window for the 1940's original.
I make the movie sound like it's a horror fest, it really isn't, it won't creep you out as an adult, it's just got a few eerily wacky qualities about it that play on a child's imagination a lot more. I don't know how many times i've heard grown adults say, "my God that movie freaked me out as a kid". It really was trippy.

Oddly enough, it's these twisted and freaky additions to the sequel, that made it so much more memorable than the dull original. All i remember from movie 1 was a whole bunch of singing. In 'Return', i had the Oz scared into me, and it had a much more profound effect on my mind. As an adult, obviously i don't find it scary anymore. It's still got that "wacky creepy" factor though. Aside from a much darker storyline, the rest of the movie still stands strong as a good childrens fantasy film. I can watch it today and still get a kick out of it, not only because it's well made, but also for nostalgic reasons.

You don't need to see the original Oz to understand this movie. Most people have a fair understanding of what Oz and Dorothy's previous adventure was all about anyway. This is the type of kids movie that would appeal to someone who likes their fairy tales a little more on the "interesting" side. Should you show it to kids? it won't cause any serious damage, but i wouldn't be surprised if a kid does get a little uncomfortable about some of the characters. Lord knows me and many others did.

My Favourite Albums Of ALL TIME! #2Fever Ray Fever Ray [2009]
The debut album from Fever Ray is the solo project from one half of the Swedish electronic duo, 'The Knife'. The half i'm talking about is the singer, Karin Dreijer Anderson [that's a mouthful]. If you don't know her, or her previous music with her brother in The Knife, chances are you may recognize her voice if you listen to Royksopp, who she collaborates with on two of their albums. She's most well known on one of their more popular songs, 'What Else Is There?' [a personal favourite of mine].
If you're hearing her voice for the first time, you will remember it forever. Much like Bjork, she has a very distinctive way of singing. In fact, she sounds like a strangled baby. Trust me though, it works better than it sounds, especially with the style of music she makes.

It's a little hard to describe exactly what Fever Ray sounds like. Those who've heard her previous music with The Knife have an idea of what to expect, but if you're a Knife virgin, it may take a few listens before you completely get into the Fever Ray album.
It's a haunting and dark collection of music, that has an odd innocence to it. It's almost child like in places, like a kids nightmare, but not in a scary way. The album is eerily beautiful in places [Concrete Walls], a little more electronic in others [Triangle Walks], and it even has a slight David Lynch vibe at one point [Stranger Than Kindness]. There's even a track that has distorted baby sounds running through it, all while singing lyrics that sound oddly like they're about birth and re-incarnation [Here Before]. It can be very experimental at times.

The first time i heard this album, i was instantly drawn to it. It was interesting, but it didn't completely click with me until months later when i finally understood the album. It's a unique piece of work, very layered, and also very mellow, so you need to be in the right mind frame to let it works it's magic on you properly. Think of it as a darker version of Bjork's 'Vespertine' album. They both share a similar child like feel to them, in fact, listening to both albums one after the other is a really great experience.

I included this album in my list of favourites from 2009, but it only appeared in my 'Honorable Mentions' list, instead of my top 10. I only wish the album struck with me sooner, because it would have come in at #2 on my list. It still got a mention though, so oh well. It's now one of my top 10 favourite albums of the last 10 years.

If you want something interesting, and you like ambient electronic music, chances are you'll absolutely love this album. Even if it's not really your thing, it's still a good album to have a listen to, just so you can experience something that you may not be used to hearing. The album really takes you to another place. It completely transports you to another world, it's very beautiful.

It appeared on countless critics favourite lists throughout 2009, i can see why, it's amazing.

1. If I Had A Heart 4/5

2. When I Grow Up 4/5
3. Dry And Dusty 5/5
4. Seven 4/5
5. Triangle Walks 3/5
6. Concrete Walls 5/5
7. Now's The Only Time I Know 4/5
8. I'm Not Done 4/5
9. Keep The Streets Empty For Me 5/5
10. Coconut 5/5
11. Stranger Than Kindness 5/5
12. Here Before 4/5

My Favourite Films Of All Time! #14
Martyrs [2008]
Starring: Morjana Alaoui, Mylene Jampanoi
Directed by: Pascal Laugier

"They did not finish to be alive..."

You want to see some fucked up shit?.....My oh, my! some of you may have heard of Martyrs, it caused quite the stir when it was shown throughout Europe during film festival season in 2009/2008. Why was it so controversial? well, because it's violent as shit and disturbing as fuck!.

Martyrs follows the story of Anna and Lucie. They became friends many years ago at an orphanage where Lucie was sent after she had escaped from an abandoned industrial building where she was tortured by the people holding her captive. Over the years Lucie has struggled with flashbacks and inner demons, she can't cope, she can't get on with her life, and she sets out to find the people WHO did those awful things to her as a child.
Soon enough, the people are discovered. Lucie sets out for bloody revenge while Anna goes along for the ride to give Lucie support. However, Anna is unaware of just how far Lucie is willing to go, and soon enough they both find themselves surrounded by dead bodies and bloody murder on their hands.

That's pretty much the BASIC plot of the film. If i go any further i'll give too much away, and i don't want to do that because the movie takes some VERY big twists and turns, and you'll soon find yourself watching more than just a gory revenge story.
This movie isn't for everyone, for every person who loved it, i know just as many who hated it. There isn't any real message behind the film, but that wasn't the point of the movie anyway. The Director has said that he wanted to take the viewer on a journey, he wanted to give them an experience. Whether you end up liking the movie or not, there's no denying you'll have an "eye opening" experience watching it. I sure as fuck did.As i said before, there's no message behind the film, but that doesn't mean there isn't a POINT to all the violence we see on screen, there is. It just takes a whole lot of torture to get to the secret behind what's happening. If this sounds like something you're willing to give a shot, you'll get a lot out of it.
The movie left me feeling a whole mix of emotions. I thought it was confronting and disturbing, but i also thought it was really sad at times, especially during the middle portion of the story. I felt so much for one character in particular, it really threw me back. If you strip away all the violence, are you left with anything worthwhile? yes, most definitely. It's a story about survival, and how much one person can take mentally and physically. What does reaching the point of no return feel like if you completely detach your mind from your body?. It's like watching an exercise in human experience. It's gets you thinking.
When you actually find out WHY certain things in the story are happening, the movie takes an even more interesting turn. There's a slight "supernatural" vibe to the final section of the movie. There's strong links between questions about the afterlife. The makers of the film certainly took the word MARTYRS literally when they made this movie.

Credit needs to be given to the 2 lead actresses in this. Both roles required quite a lot of emotion with Lucie losing her mind and Anna being tortured for endless amounts of time. I can't imagine how you get to a place like that mentally and act out something so vicious. It's hard to watch at times, because the abuse is so relentless.
Even though the movie is very gory, the style of direction, the cinematography and the overall look of the movie are beautifully done. It's very slick in presentation. You can't take your eyes off the screen.

Martyrs has become one of my favourite horror films of all time. It still makes me think no matter how many times i see it. Every time i watch it i feel like i've just been dragged by my hair through some dirty bushes. It grabs you by the balls and rips them out. I love that people are so torn by it as well, it means it's doing what it's meant to.
I think it's a masterpiece! one of the best horror films of the last 10 decade.

My Favourite Films of All Time! #13The Craft [1996]
Directed by: Andrew Fleming
Starring: Neve Campbell, Fairuza Balk, Robin Tunney

"Relax... it's only magic"

In 1996, when The Craft came out, something happened. Girls all over the world started wearing black, buying crystals, and reading about witchcraft. The Craft had a MASSIVE effect on teenage popular culture for a good few years. Why? because for the first time ever on film, witches were taken out of horror movies and fantasy epics, and were actually depicted as modern and cool. Being a witch was sexy, it meant you could dress like a whore and be a badass without being a hook nosed green skinned troll with a pointy hat, It also meant you had "pussy power", because magic seriously connects girls with their inner sex god.

The Craft follows the story of Sarah [Robin Tunney], the new girl in school who has no friends, and feels like an outsider. She ends up befriending the "freaks" of her grade, Nancy [Fairuza], Bonnie [Neve] and Rochelle [Rachel True]. What Sarah doesn't realize is that these girls are witches. Sarah herself is also a witch. So when these 4 girls join forces, they start casting spells and making their mundane teenage worlds a better place. Sarah's one wish is to make the popular guy in school fall in love with her, Bonnie's wish is to make the scars on the skin of her back disappear, Rochelle wishes she would stop being bullied by a racist rich white tramp, and Nancy.........well......Nancy is a little power hungry, so she wishes to triple her power and become the strongest witch of them all.
They all get their wishes. Unfortunately, with power comes responsibility, and when you abuse that responsibility, you get some serious consequence. Things start going wrong. Sarah's spellbound new boyfriend becomes a stalker, Bonnie's become an attractive scarless bitch, Rochelle's powers are making her bullies life a living hell [bitch loses her hair] and Nancy is running high on magic and losing her mind to "the dark side".

Sarah see's the mess the girls have made, and tries to put a stop to it. Sadly for her, the other 3 girls are now off with Satan [not really], and all they wanna do is wreak as much magic vagina powered havoc as they can!
Sarah is left to fight against the girls and try to make things right. This ain't no silly little cat fight though. This is some serious flying witches cuntery, and Sarah is gonna have to get her magic mojo into gear because Nancy and her 2 minions want to whoop her ass with as much magic as they can throw at her.
Let's get one thing straight, this isn't any Bewitched for a 90's generation bullshit. There's no cutesy pie spell casting and sweetie pie girly special effects. This is serious!. These girls find some uber power, and they use the shit out of it.
The great thing about The Craft is that they've set the entire movie in a realistic world. There are many "witchy" moments, but it's all still grounded enough to not make it hokey. A lot of the "magic law" discussed in the movie is in fact based on real Wiccan texts. They had some witch from the biggest coven in America giving the film makers the information they needed to make the movie a little more authentic. In fact, the big group spell casting done during the beach scene IS an actual real life spell. Cool stuff.

The story also has some hidden themes about female power and the types of urges and changes girls go through during their tender teenage years. It's about control, it's about being something you want to be, about having those things during that time in your life to help you be happier and stronger. That doesn't mean guys can't get into this movie though. There's plenty here for boys to like. The story is entertaining, and of course, the girls themselves get shorter skirts everytime they're powers get stronger. You know how boys are, heh....

Another great thing about the movie is the cast. The girls themselves are very like able, even when they turn bad. Robin Tunny who plays Sarah, actually had a shaved head while filming this movie. She wore a wig the entire time. Sometimes, it's a little obvious with the sprouting like way her hair grows from her forehead. Neve Campbell sighs and buck tooths her way through her role as Bonnie. She also really needs a bra at one point, but we love her anyway. Rachel true as Rochelle is the one you root for the most, mainly because the racist shit she deals with gets on my last nerve. And Fairuza, oh Fairuza, she certainly has a face only a mother could love. Not that she's UGLY per se, but that girl has a mouth on her that could swallow a whole basketball. The gothed out, grunge trash make up doesn't help either, BUT.............she is pretty cool, and she plays the role like a fucking mental patient.

There's a handful of 90's teen films that have really stood the test of time for me. The Craft is one of them. If you were in high school in the late 90's, chances are, you've seen the movie 10 times. Maybe even more. And you most likely love it. I honestly haven't met anyone who hasn't enjoyed it. It's just too fucking kick ass!
If you haven't seen it, get your fat ass on a broom stick and fly somewhere to find it. You won't regret it. And if you watch it and hate it, i'll seriously hex your sorry ass!

[Kisses a tree]My first podcast adventure of 2010. This one is shared with a few other people, i'm in the last section of the recording, "Round 3" to be exact. We talk about all things AVATAR, so if you've seen it, give it a listen!.....

>>>>PODCAST: 12.1.10<<<<

My Favourite Albums Of ALL TIME! #1 Madonna Ray of Light [1998]
A few years before Ray of Light was released, Madonna went through a bit of a career backlash. She took her sex filled image to new heights in her 'Justify My Love' video in 1990. Then she released her 'Erotica' album a couple years after, alongside her nude coffee table book called SEX. By the end of 1992, she'd gone from Madonna to Vagonna!, and the media was having a field day keeping their eye on her constant publicity stunts and over sexualized image. Once her 1994 album hit, 'Bedtime Stories', critics claimed her reign as Queen of pop may be over. Her record sales weren't as strong as they used to be, and people were getting sick of her.
Madonna took some time off, she had a baby [Lola] and eventually won back critics praises with her performance in the movie musical 'Evita'.

In 1998, 4 years after her last album, she was ready to make a comeback, so she unleashed what many fans and critics consider to be the best album of her career, Ray of Light!.
On ROL she joined forces with music producer William Orbit, and Madonna's love affair with electronic music was BORN!. The album was her most personal at the time. It deals with issues about the sacrifices she made for fame, motherhood, and her new found spirituality. The album goes between ambient synths [To Have & Not To Hold], heavy bass driven dance numbers [Skin], and rock light mid tempo tracks [Candy Perfume Girl]. There's also a couple ballads on this album that i consider to be some of the best songs she ever did, those being 'The Power of Goodbye' and my all time favourite Madonna song, 'Frozen'.
The album has a very strong ethereal and aquatic feel to it. You'd think Madonna was dipping her head in and out of the ocean while making this album, ha!.

The album starts off on a quiet note, but slowly builds into a beautifully produced electronic masterpiece. The track listing from tracks #5-#11 are perfect in every way. It's one mind blowing song after another. Then the album goes out on a quiet note again. The only track on the album that doesn't do all that much for me, is the last song, 'Mer Girl'. In saying that though, it fits well with the rest of the album, and is one of the most interesting songs she's done, so i wouldn't get rid of it, it's still an important part of the journey.

When people ask me what my favourite album of all time is, i usually say this one. There are a handful of other albums that could fit the #1 spot easily depending on my mood, but Ray of Light is the one i mention the most. You'd think i'd be playing the album every week since i love it so much, but that isn't the case at all. In fact, i only play the album as a whole a couple times a year. I've heard it so much over the years, that i need to be in the right mood for it. I do love it to death though.

Ray of Light seems to be the ONE Madonna album none fans own. I love that about it. Similar to 'Like A Prayer', it stands on it's own feet as a special project separate from her more fluffier pop albums.
It's honest and atmospheric. You haven't heard what she's capable of until you've heard this album. It's the best thing she's EVER done.

1. Drowned World/Substitute For Love 5/5

2. Swim 4/5
3. Ray of Light 4/5
4. Candy Perfume Girl 4/5
5. Skin 5/5
6. Nothing Really Matters 5/5
7. Sky Fits Heaven 5/5
8. Shanti/Ashtangi 5/5
9. Frozen 5/5
10. The Power of Goodbye 5/5
11. To Have & Not To Hold 5/5
12. Little Star 4/5

13. Mer Girl 3/5

My music is YOUR music!Similar to my favourite movies of all time posts [which i'll still be doing], i'm going to start doing write ups on my favourite albums of all time too!!!!!!!. I'll post my first one tomorrow. There will be more to say about some albums than others, but each one i write about will be an album i TRULY love. I'd provide a download link for each album if i could, but i don't want my precious blog shut down, so i'll play it safe. You all know how to get that shit anyway..............fucking criminals!

xx.

Eye on 2010!
Here's what's tickling my pickle in 2010. Well.........most of it anyway, i'm sure i've missed something......

MusicGoldfrapp: After Goldfrapp sent us into dream land with their last album Seventh Tree, they'll be returning back to more of an upbeat style with their 2010 album. I always enjoy a bit of The Frapp.

Sade: It's been over 10 years since her last album, what the fuck has she been doing all that time???? Anyway, she's back this year with a brand new collection of songs. I've heard the first single "Soldier of Love", it's amazing. The rest should be good.

Auf Der Maur: It's been a while since her debut album. I've been waiting for this for a few years. Hopefully it lives up to her previous record which i loved.

Britney Spears: It'll be nearly 2 years since her 'come back' album. Hopefully she'll drop a bit of the 'pop' this year and give us something a little edgier.

MGMT: I have no idea how on Earth they'll top their debut album, but i'm interested to see what else they can come up with. 'Oracular Spectacular' was fucking awesome!

Christina Aguilera: The Queen of delayed releases, the long awaited 4th album by Xtina will finally see the light of day this year. I'm not a hardcore fan, but with Ladytron, Sia and Tricky on board for this, i can't deny how curious i am to hear it.

Jennifer Lopez: Her career is dead, it's been that way for a while, but i've always had a soft spot for some Jenny Lo!. This will no doubt give us the usual hot urban style music she's known for. 'Louboutins' is all sorts of cheesy goodness!.

Kelis: I wish this shit would hurry up and get released! She went and got herself knocked up which pushed her album release from 09', to 10'. It's been too long since her last album, i love Kelis.

Erykah Badu: She'll be releasing the sequel to 'New Amrykah' this year. Part 1 was a great album. She so smoof, she so cool, love me some Erykah.

M.I.A: Another artist delaying her album release due to being preggers. Her first album was good, her second album was AMAZING, let's see if she can pull it off a third time around this year once the new album drops.

Santigold: She used to be Santogold, now she's Santigold. Her debut was cool, i'll be interested to see what new ideas she has for album #2.

Roisin Murphy: Her last album was pretty cool. I've heard the new single and it should be another good album.

Madonna: No official word on this yet, but she's on a new label and it'll be 2 years since Hard Candy by the end of 10'. She ain't getting any younger, so i assume a new album will launch this year. Let's hope it's better than her last album [which i liked, but she can do better].


MoviesAlice In Wonderland: This is going to be one massive movie. It's had a very early net buzz, and the movie is hugely anticipated. Plus, it's all being presented in IMAX 3D, my favourite!!! Can't wait!

A Nightmare on Elm St: It's either going to be shit with a great lead performance, or a lot of fun with a great lead performance. It can go either way, especially with that dumb fuck Michael Bay involved. We'll see, but it's a remake i've been dying to see happen.

Let Me In: The U.S remake of Let The Right One In. The original was a moody little vampire movie, i enjoyed it. I'm curious to see what someone else can do with it though. Should be interesting.

Salt: Angelina Jolie + Action movie = Badassery of the highest form. I'm there!

Inception: Chris Nolan goes deep into a sci fi mind fuck. He's an amazing director, so i'm sure it'll be great. The trailer definitely peaked my interest without giving anything away. Looks cool.

Clash of the Titans: Hopefully they pull this one off. It's either going to be a load of Hollywood tosh, or it'll be a great throw back to old skool adventure epics with a modern day punch in the face!.

The Runaways: Cannot WAIT for this. A badass girl band taking over the 70's rock scene, with Kristen Stewart in a mullet and Dakota Fanning running around in her undies. Uh huh!

The Twilight Saga: Eclipse: New Moon rocked my socks! This will be even better.

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hollows: Part 1: The Harry Potter movie series has grown into quite the beastly adventure! I've enjoyed seeing each one. This will no doubt be an epic movie once both parts are combined. Should be good.

It only feels like yesterday that i was doing my 2008 list. It's been a bit of a mixed bag this year for music and movies. Some great stuff, some average stuff, some shit stuff. Here it all is....

10. Paloma Faith Do You Want The Truth Or Something Beautiful?
Last year came Duffy [who i love], and this year came Paloma Faith. She has an amazing voice. Amy Whinehouse had a great voice too, but one thing she lacked for me were hooks in her songs. Duffy has the hooks, and so does Paloma.
Best track: New York.

09. Muse The Resistance
Muse have always been very hit and miss to me. I've enjoyed a few of their songs, but this is the first full album i've purchased by them. It's very "grand" in places. They've experimented a little.
Best track: Undisclosed Desires.

08. Marilyn Manson The High End Of Low
I enjoyed his last album [Eat Me Drink Me], but this new one is a better overall product. The album is a bit overlong, but he knows how to write some GREAT melodies.
Best track: Four Rusted Horses.

07. Alicia Keys The Element of Freedom
Four albums into her career and she still can't seem t0 get it wrong. There's less piano here when compared to her other records. The 80's r&b vibe suits her voice. I love Alicia Keys!
Best track: Try Sleeping With A Broken Heart.

06. t.A.T.u. Waste Management
They released the Russian version of this last year, and it had some decent songs on it. This English version however is MUCH better, and it came in an epic TRANSCENDED version that featured an intro to every track. It turned it into a much more meatier album.
Best track: Fly On The Wall.

05. The Twilight Saga: New Moon Original Soundtrack
If there's on thing Twilight haters can all agree on, it's that the movie soundtracks from the film series have been REALLY good. New Moon is the best soundtrack i've heard in a LONG time.
Best track: Hearing Damage - Thom Yorke

04. Yeah Yeah Yeahs It's Blitz
Not sure if it's there best album, i'm still torn between this one and their last record [Show Your Bones]. Overtime though, i think this may become my favourite by them. It's a grower.
Best track: Heads Will Roll.

03. Lady GaGa The Fame Monster
One year after The Fame, the world wanted MORE! so GaGa gave it!!!!! The mini Monster album is a good mix of trademark GaGa melodies, as well as giving us some great new sounds that we haven't heard from her before. Love her!

02. Peaches I Feel Cream
I played the SHIT out of this album ALL year. She should collaborate more often with other artists, it worked really well on this album.
Best track: Talk To Me.

01. Gossip Music For Men
I've always liked a bit of Gossip over the years. This album is what sealed the deal for me though. Every song on the album is perfect, and every hook plays over and over in your brain till you want to EXPLODE. They've created a very original sound for themselves. Beth Ditto is God.
Best track: 4 Letter Word


Honorable mentions:
Florence + The Machine - Lungs
Fever Ray - Self Titled
Rihanna - Rated R
30 Seconds To Mars - This Is War
Little Boots - Hands



Chris Cornell Scream
Yes, SCREAM indeed. The biggest WTF! moment in music this year belongs to THIS album. Chris dropped his rock sound for a Timbaland produced urban/pop/rock mess of an album. His fans ran in horror [or laughed], the critics burnt the album alive, and it didn't even make a pond ripple upon it's release. It has literally vanished into the abyss it came from. A utter piece of shit that confuses and amazes me at the same time. What next? Justin Timberlake releases a death metal record?. Chris Ohwell.

Flo Rida Roots
You know what i think of when i imagine ROOTS? Long hard wooden tree legs that STAB into the ground. That's what listening to Flo Rida is like. STABBING IN MY EARS. He's another one of those SHAGGY style rappers [remember Shaggy, lol] who knows how to write a catchy hook, but creates music to go along with it that makes you want to rip the skin off your face in some sort of graphic bloody manner. No Rida.

Brooke Hogan The Redemption
I was almost NOT going to include this. It's just so pointless to bash something that's SO obviously wanting to be slaughtered. It's an album full of songs Britney rejected. In fact, even Britney would laugh at this TRY HARD DESPERATE attempt of a record. I honestly can't even describe it. Don't EVER bother with it. How Brooke even managed to work with ANYONE to make this album is beyond me. Guess some producers will do anything for a bit of cash. Brooke NOgan.

20. Scars Basement Jaxx
There's always a bit of room for some Jaxx!....AND Kelis, who's on guest vocals.

19. New York Paloma Faith
Forget Amy Whinehouse, Duffy and Paloma do it better. Pretty song.

18. 4 Letter Word Gossip
Any of their new songs could have made it here, i fucking love this band.

17. Sexy Bitch David Guetta
It's best enjoyed full blast and in the company of 1000 sweaty people.

16. Try Sleeping With A Broken Heart Alicia Keys
A bit of a departure for Alicia. Got a bit of an 80's vibe to it. One of her best songs.

15. Gifted N.A.S.A.
This song is EPIC, but the album they churned out along with it was a fucking shitty mess. Don't take this track as an indicator of what the rest of the debut album sounds like.

14. Symmetry Little Boots
If you like Human League, you'll like this.

13. Hearing Damage Thom Yorke
Dark and moody. On VERY heavy rotation.

12. World Go Round Busta Rhymes
Impossible to listen to without turning up full blast.

11. Boom Boom Pow The Black Eyed Peas
We can thank Daft Punk for this. Crazy, crazy, bass line.

10. Howl Florence + The Machine
There were a few Florence tracks which could have made this spot, but i went with the one i listened to the most.

09. Change Daniel Merriweather
The album didn't live up to this song unfortunately, but whatever, still a great song. Plus, it's always cool seeing an Aussie release something decent.

08. Pearl's Dream Bat For Lashes
I've wanted to include a Lashes track in my top 20 for a while now, but i always seem to run out of room. Not this year though!!!!! beautiful song.

07. Heads Will Roll Yeah Yeah Yeahs
This track was the best one off their 2009 record. Great video too.

06. Tigerlily La Roux
While everyone went nuts over 'Bulletproof', i fell in love with this.

05. Undisclosed Desires Muse
Great song. You can never go wrong with synths.

04. The Day We Fell Apart Kelly Clarkson
This song was RIDICULOUSLY placed onto the album track listing as a bonus song. It's the best thing she's done.

03. Talk To Me Peaches
Very grimy and dirty sounding, much like Peaches herself.

02. Ignorance Paramore
Their 2009 album was a bit of a let down, but it did feature a few great tracks on it. This was the best one. ParaMORE!

01. Bad Romance Lady GaGa
Not only is this her best track, but it's also become my favourite pop song of the last 10 years!. Creepy, loud, sexy, it's perfect!. It never gets old.



Round Round Flo Rida
Round Round, in my fucking head, none stop, like torture. Someone stop him, please!

Kiss U Thru The Phone Soulja Boy
I'm sure i spelled this idiots name wrong. Everything he does is wrong though, so who cares really. Kiss You Through The Phone? is this shit serious? and people loved this too, fucking hell. Smack you with a phone is more like it.

I Gotta Feeling The Black Eyed Peas
The most annoying song of 2009. I want to punch the radio every time i hear it. It was a massive single, yet i can't find ONE person who likes it? WHO IS BUYING IT?

Devilicious Nikki Webster
Many of you may not know her. She's an ex Aussie child singer who reached puberty and thought she'd sing a Britney song from 1998 in a Christina Aguilera style video to show us all how grown up she has become. It's embarrassing and crap in every way possible. It's also not very sexy. I'm all for guilty pleasures, but anyone who likes this is seriously an asshole.

We Are Golden Mika
Someone tell this dumb twat to shut his mouth. Awful. And while you're at it, cut that stupid curly bouncy hairdo. Mikunt.

Good Girls Gone Bad Cobra Starship
Worst song of 2009 for me. Annoying lyrics, punchable lead singer, and a ridiculously pointless cameo from some Gossip Girl moron. FUCK OFF COBRA STARSHIT!

BEST: Lady GaGa Bad Romance
A nice example of what you can do with a massive budget.Weird and sexy.
Honorable mentions: Peaches - Talk To Me, Yeah Yeah Yeahs - Heads Will Roll.


WORST: Chris Brown I Can Transform You
Hilariously stupid. It's a complete mess. What IS this video meant to be? robots, ninjas, geisha's? riiiiight. I don't know what's worse, people turning into cars, or Chris flipping around nun chucks for some random reason. It's like he watched too many Sasha Fierce and Lady GaGa videos and then tried to make his own, only.....he lacks the style and imagination to pull it off.

2009 has been one of the most "fascinating" cinema years i've had. You rarely come across movies that not only entertain you, but also heighten your viewing experience in a unique way. Martyrs, Avatar and Paranormal Activity are 3 movies this year that have been some of the most exciting times i've had at the cinema. They took me some place new, and that's what fascinates me most about movies. They have the ability to transport me somewhere else and give me an EXPERIENCE. Paranormal Activity i couldn't get out of my mind for WEEKS, Martyrs shocked my senses, and Avatar was a visual assault on my eye balls. They're ALL here...

10. Where The Wild Things Are
Starring: James Gandolfini
It's not for kids, in fact, it's a bit trippy and they wouldn't understand the message behind the movie. Great for adults though, very sweet.

09. Inglorious Basterds
Starring: Brad Pitt, Eli Roth
Who DOESN'T like Quentin Tarantino? i'll tell you who........NOBODY!. Some people think this is the only film he's done that's comes close to PULP FICTION standards, maybe it is, maybe it isn't, either way, it's badass.

08. Harry Potter & The Half Blood Prince
Starring: Daniel Radcliff, Helena Bonham Carter
I've always enjoyed the HP movies. This has been the best one so far. I can see why some fans were split on it, it's very dark. It's my kinda style though. POTT ON!

07. Jennifer's Body
Starring: Megan Fox, Amanda Seyfried
I love Diablo Cody, so there's no surprise that i enjoyed her writing in this. It's funny, sexy and gory. One of those movies you can easily watch over and over.

06. Drag Me To Hell
Starring: Alison Lohman, Justin Long
I love a good horror comedy. I revisited this a second time this year and i was happy to see it was even better second time around. Gross and funny at the same time.

05. Paranormal Activity
Starring: Some tubby girl and some guy
The most interesting movie experience i had this year. Had me on the edge of my seat. Creepy, realistic and VERY memorable. Deserved all the hype it got.

04. The Twilight Saga: New Moon
Starring: Robert Pattinson, Kristen Stewart
I was surprisingly entertained from start to finish with this. The direction and music elevated it to a completely different level for me. Some great new additions to the cast as well. Now for Eclipseeeee!!!

03. Avatar
Starring: Sam Worthington, Sigourney Weaver
Mind blowingly epic and huge in every way possible. Technically, it's like nothing you've seen before, like an orgasm for the eyes. Story wise, it's nothing to be amazed by, but it has a nice message and the world James Cameron created is so immersible. It needs to be seen in IMAX 3D. Great fun.

02. Watchmen
Starring: Billy Crudup, Malin Akerman
You'll either get this, or you won't, it's not for everyone. It's intelligent, it's faithful to the comic book and it's AMAZINGLY shot by Zac Snyder. Complex and interesting, i loved it.

01. Martyrs
Starring: Some French chics
Starts off as a straight forward gore movie. Then it unfolds and turns into something a lot more interesting. There are so many deeper meanings behind the film, and at certain times, it's an incredibly powerful movie experience. It's so horrific, it almost becomes beautiful in it's own sick way. It's hard to explain, and it's not for everyone. People either love it or hate it. Personally, i think it's a masterpiece.


Honorable mentions:

- District 9
- Let The Right One In
- Bruno
- Whip It


500 Days of Summer
I wanted to like it, but it was too pretentious for it's own good. It also featured HUGELY unlikeable characters, especially Summer, who was a right twat!. I can see the appeal, but honestly, it just rubbed me up the wrong way. In fact, i kinda hated it.

Orphan
A movie that should be retitled ABORTION. Boring run of the mill "creepy kid" movie with a twist that is SO ridiculous, it's amazing people even BOUGHT INTO IT. Laughably silly.

Obsessed
A movie starring Beyonce, produced by Beyonce's Dad, and featuring the music of Beyonce. It's a lame vanity project that starts off surprisingly well, and slowly turns into a cliched laugh fest filled with every stalker movie cliche you can think of, and a laughably cheesy "girl on girl" bitch fight where both female leads go from timid every day women, to roof top kicking super bitches. The final shot of the film is a random zoom in on Beyonce's face which may as well have had a scrolling text saying "buy my album" across the screen. Desperate and cheesy.

Heidie Mongtage and Spencer The Pratt are two of the mot vapid idiots the media has ever set it's lenses on. This year, we saw Heidick try and launch her much delayed [thankfully] music career. We saw our first glimpse of it when her block faced boyfriend, The Pratt, filmed a music video for his brain dead girlfriend called Black Out. The video featured Heidumb rolling around in a bikini at a pool side. The song was utter shit, and 90% of the video budget went to filling Heidingbat's tits with silicone. Did they honestly think this shit would sell?
Then came Heidong's debut stage performance at some random pageant show. She mimed her way through the song and danced badly. Honestly, it's like i'm watching a pop star from 1998. Times have changed Heidingle my sweet, we already have one BRITNEY, and she does it a lot better than you do.
There was also The Pratt's claims about Heidump being the next MADONNA, and being better than Lady GaGa. Funnily enough, when The Pratt and Mongtit's were seen at a Lady GaGa gig earlier this year, they were pelted with glow sticks and were forced to leave the venue after only one song.
Aside from failed attempts at having careers, these two retards show their HUGELY hideous mugs on red carpets around America and talk a lot of shit. Most of the shit comes from The Pratt's humorously triangular shaped mouth, which seems to open and close at a rapid rate as it release fecal matter after fecal matter. Does he honestly think anyone cares? does Heidope honestly think people find her attractive? does Pratt not realize he has a hilarious President like hair do and punchable face? do people HONESTLY like these 2 idiots? because oddly enough, they do have SOME fans. Most of the people who like them tend to be The Hills fans anyway, and that doesn't say much does it?

They are the most pointless and unlikeable couple in the world. I would give them this award every year for the rest of my life if i could.

See Heidick's crap 'Black Out' video here


Let's get one thing straight, kids are bastards. I don't usually like them, and when i do, they need to be well behaved and polite. Every so often though, a child comes along, that is so amazing, i can't help but bask in it's kiddie splendor!
Balloon Boy is a lying little cunt who joined forces with his parents to pretend that he was trapped in a floating helium balloon. It was all over world news! cameras followed the balloon as it crossed the skies, and everyone feared for Balloon Boy's safety. While the world waited for the poor Balloon Boy to be saved, he was sucking his thumb and laughing at the stupid adults on TV from his basement.
I know what you're all saying, "but the parents forced him to do it!"...............bullshit!. Kids are some of the most evil creatures on Earth, he knew EXACTLY what he was doing!. The kid doesn't care, he knew he would get away with it because he's a tiny person. His parents who devised the whole plan took the wrap.

I take my hat off to you Balloon Boy, child mastermind extraordinaire!

Until next year xx.

Tonight i'm gonna party like it's 1999!
It's been a while since i did a guest stink on the Super Podcast with Super Marcey. Last night we mic'd up and yammered on about movies released way back in 1999. It's was an oddly FULL year for big movies, you'd be surprised at how many well known ones came out that year. WHY NOT REVISIT IT WITH US!!!!!?

>>>SUPER PODCAST #16 - The Films of 1999<<<



:)